Adventures in Melanoma
So, this is a crazy way to kick off my blog… Turns out I do have melanoma.
Now, some of my friends already know this was a possibility—and others are hearing it now. Sorry if you’re in camp #2; I just didn’t feel like making a news story out of my little healthcare adventure, and then I could never quite tell when it was time to. Especially since I hadn’t told my mom. I have some pretty good reasons for doing it this way: I like my privacy, believe it or not, when something could possibly be a Big Deal; I don’t like to freak people out or make them worry (esp. my mom, after she clocked soooo many hours of worry unjustly when I was young); I have a sort of superstition about making things real by talking about them; and it’s embarrassing to me.
Even though I wasn’t really considering the Big Deal possibility an actual possibility, I kept it quiet just in case. Also, as though to reinforce that whim, a well-meaning friend came over just to share her own melanoma drama (horror story would be too strong here, yet only just). It made me a little more anxious, but remember at this point I wasn't even considering the word "melanoma."
BUT now that my mom knows, and now that it’s gone, I can talk about it. I’m only stage 1, and only because once you have actual melanoma, you cannot be <stage 1. It was less than 1mm thick,and I had to have 2 surgeries just to be sure we got it all because it had grown and regressed (which is apparently not pleasing to doctor-types) and it became obvious where only in pathology. And yes, it was in the ugly mole you’ve been telling me to get looked at (but the whole mole was not melanotic, just a few spots). If you want to tell me “I told you so,” get in line... oh and shame on you, what a thing to be proud of being right about! LOL
BUT now that my mom knows, and now that it’s gone, I can talk about it. I’m only stage 1, and only because once you have actual melanoma, you cannot be <stage 1. It was less than 1mm thick,and I had to have 2 surgeries just to be sure we got it all because it had grown and regressed (which is apparently not pleasing to doctor-types) and it became obvious where only in pathology. And yes, it was in the ugly mole you’ve been telling me to get looked at (but the whole mole was not melanotic, just a few spots). If you want to tell me “I told you so,” get in line... oh and shame on you, what a thing to be proud of being right about! LOL
So it’s been taken off and doubly taken off. My surgeon is Dr. Avanel in Selmer (oh yes I really did get it done in Selmer, tyvm). I really like him a lot, even though he doesn’t like to talk to me without a friend (I’ll write about that later, because it was stinking funny) and even though he cuts chunks out of me. My other doctor, Dr. Robinson, also of Selmer, is however on serious PROBATION after telling me that melanoma can go to my brain (I’ll write about that later, too, because first I have to call my mom again). Apparently he neglected to read Dr. Avanel’s memo about being careful what to say to me because I might FREAK OUT.
Don't go read a bunch of stuff on melanoma on Google and start worrying about me if you haven't already, because I'm fine. My friends have taken amazing care of me through my surgeries (especially Dossie, along with taking care of her brother, mom, husband, and 4 kids!). I'm just finding new things to be grateful for all the time and trying to get back on track. :)
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